Are we crazy to move children to the usvi??
My husband and I have completely fallen in love with St. John during our honeymoon and vacation...We have a one and four year old. We are middle class people in the states, own a home, 2 cars. We desparately want to move down to St.John, but would also do St.Thomas. Are we crazy for thinking we can do such a thing with 2 small children? We know life will be 100% different than the states which makes it that much more appealing. Obviously we won't be able to buy a home, from what I understand of real estate prices in St.John. Does anyone know of costs for rentals that would comfortable fit 2 adults and 2 children? Also, is it feasible to own one car for a family? Any help, encouragement and discouragement is appreciated!
Hi Nikki. (My turn).
If you go to the top of this page, you should see a link for HOME. There you will find a FAQs section. Most all of your answers are there, including those regarding rental costs and STJ v. STT. Whatever remains unanswered, come back and ask. 🙂
Also, read through the many posts on this site. Tons have been written about apartment rentals, need for a car, etc. for St. John and St. Thomas. Do a bit of reaseach and you'll find answers to your questions. As a rule of thumb, you'll probably find housing costs to be higher than for comparable places "back home" and wages will probably be lower than what you are now getting (that's one of the many catch-22's about island living).
I guess to be more specific...Most people here think were are out of our minds to consider moving our children down there. We think it would be an amazing life experience for them. Are we living somewhat in a fanasy world thinking we can do this or should we be more "grown up" and think about healthcare and having them live the typical "american dream" life?
In my opinion, life for a 1 and 4 year old will be pretty much the same where ever you live, except more beach time on the weekend.
Remember, you won't be on vacation here -- you'll live here. That means jobs, day care, groceries, household chores, washing clothes, fixing dinner, etc. Pretty much like home, but the weather is better. Except when the tropical storms go through.
Why don't you bring the family down for 2 or 3 weeks. Stay someplace cheap and try to get a feel for what living here would be like? This will be the best money you'll ever spend.
Nikki,
My parents moved my brother and I to STT when we were 4 and 7. We stayed for a few years, but then returned to the states for education purposes. I have often considered moving down with my own children, but have not done so for the same reasons as my parents considered - education. I believe I would make the move if I could afford to educate my children at Antilles School while living there.
Education aside, my memories of being a child on the island are incredible - they stand out much more than my stateside living memories. Examples:
As most kids do, I learned how to ride a skateboard- but I rode mine down the water catchment (crazy!!) behind our home and also down this amazingly steep hill where our home was.
I had after school music lessons like other kids, but I learned to play steel drum - and rather than an end of year recital, we had carnival.
I had birthday parties like other kids, but my birthday parties were at Magens Bay, not Chuck E Cheese.
My family enjoyed weekend getaways like any other family, but our weekend getaways consisted of us boarding someone's boat and heading to Jost van Dyke or camping at Cinnamon Bay.
I learned about rain forrests, as most kids do, but I learned about them because I lived in one! We lived in a home that was high on a mountain and it was always damp...especially when the clouds would come and envelop our home, literally...and our clothing would be damp in the drawers, etc. We had banana trees all around our home and hearing the fruit rats go after the fruit on the roof became a normal sound.
I learned about "fire ants" by going exploring in the bush with my brother and stepping on a mound (ouch).
In the city where we live now, if a neighbor gets roudy late at night, we call the police. On STT, when Mr Malone (our neighbor down the hill) would get drunk and sing loudly (and badly) late at ngiht, mom would throw mangos from the trees at him....so we learned that mangos are multi-functional fruit 😉
Dad often had to travel to other islands in the territory, or to Puerto Rico.....so, on many days, we dropped dad off at the sea plane. Most kids drop dad off at the train.
I can recall walking down the road and sucking sugar cane, picking genips, guava, etc.
My brother and I still talk to each other like west indians (for fun)....using phrases like "me son" and when something is really good, we put our thumb and middle finger together and flick our wrist really hard to make the index finger snap against the others (would have to demonstrate, but island kids did this a lot). And mom still gets a kick out of the fact that after a few months on the island, we started calling her "moh-meeeee" like west indian kids call their moms.
All in all, it was just amazing. If you can do it at a time when your children won't be imapcted by the educational shortcomings....or you can fill in those gaps for them, I would say to do it!!!
Health wise, you are not moving to some third world country. My brother and I broke bones, needed stitches, went to the dentist, doctor etc....
Hope this helps. Email me if you want more info.
Nikki, I had to run out earlier and I ended my last post to you prematurely. I wanted to give you a bit of the "downside" as I see it. I don't think it is all orchid and sunsets....
I recall being on STJ a few years back and meeting a woman who lived there with her husband and 4 year old child. I think I recall that she moved down there when the daughter was an infant. She told me how her daughter had been ill (her daughter was very small for her age, which is what started the discussion). Her daughter had been plagued with a recuring parasite problem. I don't recall what she said about the initial symptoms, but she took thedaughter to the doctor, who diagnosed the problem and prescribed medicine to cure it. Laster, the problem recurred and the doctor prescribed the meds again. The problem cleared up again, but later recurred for a third time. This time, the doctor (to his credit) refused to prescribe anything until the mother found the source of the problem. It was in the cistern. She had to have the water tested and it turned out to have a problem. So, she had to hire a company to come out and go into her cistern. I don't recall the details, but I remember she said that she had bats and frogs in her cistern (ugh!) and whatever they had to do to correct it cost her loads of money. But, it resolved her daughters parasite problem....but her daughter was really tiny. I thought it sounded strange since I would assume that people check their water regularly, but maybe not. I am not sure if the answer is just to test your water every month or so.....
Other downsides I have considered are things link my daughter missing family members, family gatherings, museums, roller coasters, snowfall, ice skating at Rockefeller Center the week before Christmas, broadway shows, the ballet, New England weekend road trips in the fall, etc.
And, of course, top quality education that I can afford on whatever I would earn on the island...doing whatever I would do on the island...which wouldn't be what I do for a living now....
All of this being said, your children might just be at the perfect age to give it a go. I have always thought that if I did it, I would go in with the mindset that it is temporary....a 2 yr deal....and if it works out for longer, great, if not, I would come back to my home here, which I would rent out, not sell.
Thanks for that, Bluwater. I love the line about the mangos. Mom must have been a fun lady!
John, she still is! She and dad have recently taken to mailboat hopping to make their way around the Granadines.....
Dear Nikki:
There was a recent discussion on this forum related to someone with children whose husband had been offered a $50K salary at UVI on STT and who wanted to know if that sort of a salary would offer them a comfortable living. I just did a quick look-through and couldn't quickly find the thread. "Teresa" was prompted to respond and if you search her name on this forum I'm sure you'll quickly find the thread and I think you'll find the information there most interesting.
You may well be out of your minds. Much depends on your financial situation but since you've already said that you probably wouldn't be able to buy real property, then get searching on this forum.
Some things should just remain a fantasy, a hope and a dream and there's nothing wrong with that! Good luck researching.
It seems like good advice to visit with your kids for a few weeks. Vacations are of course very different from living. Having said that, my brother and sister-in-law moved to STT a year ago with their 4 year old and I've never seen them happier. They had lived on STT for 3 years before getting married and having a kid. They finally moved back but clearly knew what they were doing. They definitely believe that it's the right thing for them and especially their child. It seems like a great place to grow up.
My husband and I are moving to St. John in about 3 weeks with our 10 and 11 year old. We spent the summer on STT last year and believe that STT and STJ are the place for us. We've also spent a lot of time reading this board. It's a great resource. (Thanks to all.) We've gotten lots of questions similar to "Are you crazy to move children to the USVI?" from people stateside. We obviously decided that we're not crazy and in many ways wish that we had done it sooner.
Schools are an issue. For you personally, that could wait a couple years but I think that it's good to see what's around. With a few exceptions, the private/religious schools seem like the way to go. On STT, Antilles and the Montessori School seem to be favorites but there is also Sts. Peter and Paul (also called Catholic), All Saints and I think a couple others. On STJ, the Gifft School (formerly PinePeace or Coral Bay School- they merged a few years ago) is the only private school. There are links to most if not all on this website. All give some financial aid to those qualified so that might be a possibility. It might be good to check out the schools that appeal to you on a visit if you are planning a long-term move Health insurance would seem necessary, especially for little kids. Some jobs would offer that. There are a thousand (or maybe a million decisions) to make between now and any move. From here, it seems like it's a good idea to take each step and see what you think. Best of luck!
Overall though, I obviously think that you're not crazy to move your kids to the USVI.
I've read a few references to financial aid in consideration of moving down. I have to say that I believe it pretty irresponsible for anyone to choose to move somewhere with the idea of then asking for aid to educate their children. There are people already living on the island who need aid. Why would anyone move someplace new (by choice) with a predetermined need for aid? People moving down should, IMHO, be able to afford full fare at the privates OR use the public system (yes, last I heard Sibilly School was still a good choice and has always been favored by continentals).
One of the complaints I often hear from natives is that people move to the VI with their hands out.....taking resources from those already there.
If you can't afford to pay, don't play.
*climbing down off of soapbox*
Good point in general but it may be somewhat more complicated. If the new anesthesiologist has 5 kids and is a single parent, it might seem reasonable to provide some financial aid. There are lots of reasons people move and lots of reasons people request financial aid. Some reasons are good and some are bad. It seems like it might be a good idea to look at the individual cases.
Nikki: Don't let family shoot down your dream. That said:
Most of us who moved from the states had the idea that "it is 100% different from stateside life." However, you know the old saying: Be careful what you wish for..?. Sometimes it is Upside Down world around here. Traditions and mores that you are raised with are 180 degrees apart from what you see here. .
If you do move, don't burn your bridges back home. Put your stuff in storage- don't sell it all. Tell everyone you are going to try it for a year. That way you have an out if you want to return. Rent a furnished spot and look around a bit before you buy anything. If you are going to always wonder. "What if...?", you should try it. But don't be surprised if you don't like it.
How was that for both en- and dis-couraging at the same time! 😉
Nikki,
IMHO, there are both good and bad reasons for making a major move like the one you’re considering. Very seldom (if ever) is lasting happiness and fulfillment found in places and things. Otherwise, the happiest people would live in the largest homes with an abundance of personal possessions in places like the Hamptons, Boulder, Colorado, Miami Beach or some exotic tropical destination. Although there’s certainly nothing wrong with wanting to live in a beautiful area, that desire should be the icing on the cake – not the cake itself. Said another way, if you and your spouse believe that moving to STJ will make your already vibrant and healthy personal and family relationship even better, then go for it. However, if you’re looking for a romantic beach and tropical beauty to somehow fill a void, you’re wasting your time, energy and resources. As strange as it might sound, moving to STJ will never make you happy if you’re not happy already.
And we wait to hear from Nikki!
Magen,
Yes, I agree with you. There are always exceptions....as in a much needed anesthesiologist who is willing to move his or her family to the VI, but cannot afford private education for the children. In that case, subsidizing the tuition is sort of like an exhange of services. Of course, then the nursing aid will claim the same theory.....and the TSA agent......and the school teacher......and the IT technician.....and the security guard .....etc.....and it becomes a judgement call. I would rather see the hospital and the anesthesiologist work out the education subsidy in the benefits package.
I'm back...bluwater... you just may have sealed the deal for me! Thanks for sharing your experience as a child and the opinion of your parents. That is exactly how I image life for them to be! Just to give a little background on my husband and I... we are in our mid-thirties, married for 5 1/2 years. He have the marriage I dreamed of and the children I've dreamed of... I don't know what I did to deserve him and my children! We definitely wouldn't move the USVI to fill any void... but only to live more of the life we have experienced on our 2 10 day trips down over the last 5 years! We feel we need to do this from the depths of our souls, sometimes our minds just get in the way a little. I just feel like we only have one life--- and I just want to make the most of it... I want my children to know when I die that I never had any regrets in life, that I want them to know they can do anything if you put your heart and soul into it, and that, if this move does happen, I want to give them these unique life experiences so one day they have the confidence to make their life changing decisions, whether I agree or not. I am so inspired by everyone's encouragement and discouragement and appreciate the time everyone has spent on my questions...Does anyone know of websites for the private schools in STT? Also, is it possible to have private health insurance and does anyone know what it may run? Also, we have looked at this website for Teacher salary, but does anyone know what a Special Ed teacher would make?
Nikki,
Sounds like you'll be a VI resident before too long.
One other piece of encouragement: This morning I was thinking about the childhood experiences on the island, and the injuries I sustained (after you asked about health care) - the injuries were never serious...but, stitches here, sprains there, a break here, etc . As I've stated, my memories of childhood on the island are very vivid, and I can recall exactly what I was doing leading up to each injury. The common theme that precipitated those injuries was imaginative play. I'll spare you the details....but the point is that my imagination was really busy during my time on the island. My own daughter is now the same as I was when we moved from the states ot the VI, and her imagination is quite dull. When she receives a toy or a stuffed animal of some sort, she's always looking for it to light up, talk, walk, change color.....something. If it doesn't do anything, she'll ask (with her face twisted up) "What does it DO?"
I wish your children the most vivid imaginations the islands have to offer.....and less injuries than my brother and I sustained in the process 😉
Here's the link for Antilles School: http://www.antilles.k12.vi.us/
Nikki,
Don't listen to the naysayers. Coming from Boston I find I lead a MUCH more comfortable life here. My mortgage is a 1/3 of what it was in Boston and I have a 2 story, 3 bed 2 bath home, with 1 car garage, on a cul de sac overlooking the ocean. Its just a matter of where you are coming from and your financial situation. But I came down here with little cash less than 5k and I had a mortgage to pay and we both found jobs within 1 month and so far it has been the best decision in my life.
DO IT and Enjoy!
"Don't listen to the naysayers...Its just a matter of where you are coming from and your financial situation...DO IT and Enjoy!"
I am not a naysayer and one's financial situation is certainly a factor but there are many other important considerations when moving to the USVI, especially with children. Nikki noted that she did not think home ownership was likely for her here but since you brought up home ownership it's important to note that on island home prices vary tremendously depending on a variety of factors including location and construction (masonry costs much more) and house insurance is extremely costly. I think Nikki is right to be wondering whether or not moving here would be a good thing for her and her family and the fact that so many folks come here and leave soon after attests to the need to give the idea much thought and ask many questions, as Nikki is doing. Moving here may indeed be the right thing for her but please don't make it sound like your experience is indicative of the experience of the majority of folks who try it because the evidence does not bear that out.
Hello All,
I just wanted to add my two cents. I think that the people who move down here with an open mind and extensive research and a good attitude are the ones that have a better chance at enjoying their life here. As one of many opinion givers on this board, I think we all just try to give our honest opinions and realistic views to fit each question. I had to say on another post that a $50,000 salary and three kids was not going to cut it here on STT. The person who had that question was not dead set on moving here. It was just an opportunity that came up and she was just starting research on whether that was even possible. I hated telling her that it wasn't and also told her that if she really was set on moving here that I would give her more info to help her research along. If you want to move here, than do it, but please prepare yourself as best as possible to make your transition as smooth as possible. Moving here with kids is of course possible and many do it (including me). I think the best advice I can give is to not have grand expectations or any expectations and to be very flexible and patient. Life on island is not always the opposite of life on the mainland nor the same, it can best be described as...different.
Some things that I was surprised with after moving here:
My 7yr old (now 9) son does not like the beach. He finds that the sand sticks, the water stings his nose, and he doesn't like the sand fleas. He does like swimming pools, but there are not many public ones. Actually none. We just 'sneak' into resort pools and pretend to be tourists.
Public schools were better than I thought, but I should have budgeted for private school. The public schools are in need of drastic improvements and each school has a different situation. I had to move my kids around a lot to find the right school for them. Yes, Sibilly is the best public school on STT.
BUGS!!! I know this is a tropical environment and I know there are lots of bugs, but I didn't know that I would personally meet them all in my home! I have personally met huge wolf spiders (I saw it run in my kitchen and thought it was a mouse), centipedes, millipedes (they fell on my head from the ceiling), five or more scorpions (at different times), other spiders, ticks (they go thru screens), of course mosquitoes (if you don't scratch the bite goes away quicker), fleas, no see ums, gnats, snakes (itsy bitsy ones, maybe 6 to 8 inches - yes in my home), termites with wings, termites without wings, every kind of ant in their species, roaches - some with wings and some that were about 2+ inches, crickets, tiny bugs that hang in my closets like bats (anyone know what these are?), moths, other flying things, and leeches? (they look like slugs, but flat on one side and wider). Anyway, I have had to get over my fear of little creatures and just deal with them appropriately.
Getting used to the views and just going about my business. What I mean by that is this. Life here can be the same as anywhere else on some days. I have to feed the family, run errands, go to work, clean house, do laundry, etc and plan for the next day. It isn't like being on vacation. I go for weeks without going to the beach.
It can get boring and depressing. Living on an island isn't all fun and sunny days. I have had days of not being able to get things done, in other words - normal days. Of course, when I do get to relax on a nice day on the beach it seems worth it.
The kids don't seem to care that we live on an island. They want to know 'what's for dinner' and can they go play. If anyone asks them how they like living on an island, they stare blankly. I only hope that one day they will tell me their fond memories of life here and thank me for it!
Last, it is very hard to live here. Unless money is no object, life is harder here than anywhere else I have been.
Those were my experiences and surprises. I did do quite a bit of research before moving here and still suffered from culture shock for about the first three months. I only hope everyone else has better experiences and feels more informed. Good luck to all.
Teresa
I'm not a naysayer either. We've been here for 3 years and like it a lot. but with small children you, in my opinion, have a bigger responsibility to make sure this is the right move for your family.
At the very least, I say leave the majority of your household goods in the states for 6 months to a year and make sure you have a BIG cushion of cash ($5,000 - $10,000 extra) just in case.
Good luck.
Teresa-
Thanks for your honesty... I have been reading the Settlers Guide- got it last night and did read all about the insects and wild life. The only insect I slight fear are those faster than I, such as roaches, rats and mice. Being raised in Arizona, scorpions, roaches, black widows, wolf spiders, etc .I have, too shared my home with these- although roaches not as often- they would come up the drains in the house every so often. A couple more questions for you...How do find health care on the island, decent? Would you agree $10,000 would be a nice enough cushion to have? Do you think it would be feasible to have only one car for our family? Also, do you know of any specific trades in high demand and that might pay decent?
My wife and I used to live in a 4 bedroom house stateside, with 2 cars. We used the extra bedrooms for offices, and a crafts room. We had a basement full of stuff that we rarely touched, and we had a huge property tax bill. A year ago, we got sold, gave away or threw out most of our possessions, moved into a 1 bedroom apartment on STX, we share 1 car, and we love it! We adjusted and compromised on the smaller space and 1 car without a problem. Set your mind to it, and it will work. The views, weather, small community, relaxed pace, night life and local musicians are so nice. You can take a 1 hour vacation on the beach right over there. And the taxes are particularly low.
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