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What's up with this?

Posts: 2596
Famed Member

Hey LoriSue, if you want to hang out let me know. I love blunt but not rude people. I won't even mind if you hurl on my shoes but if you do I will probably join you. I am a sympathy puker.

Posted : November 24, 2009 1:01 am
Posts: 101
Estimable Member

Michael, focus on the good stuff....it brings a lot of true joy (and usually laughter) into the heart ....I know that sounds sappy but it really it true 🙂

Posted : November 24, 2009 1:05 am
Posts: 101
Estimable Member

Tam....Love to...:-)

Posted : November 24, 2009 1:08 am
Posts: 988
Prominent Member

A Lot of people relocate to the islands (not All) for a slower pace in life. When they get here they want the same type life that they left behind on the big island. Could it be they miss the havoc or do they get bored of the laid back atmosphere. I enjoy the weather and long lines don't seem to bother me. Crime is a problem but I have been able to deal with it (there is crime on the big island as well). Everything costs more but we are an island (islands) and everything has to be shipped here. Local Government is run by locals same as the big island. I could go on but I think you get the picture.

Why do you let it bother you?

Posted : November 24, 2009 2:37 am
Posts: 3919
Famed Member

Neil, I think the point of Lizard's post is that it doesn't bother her.

Posted : November 24, 2009 3:24 am
Posts: 1842
Noble Member
Topic starter

It doesn't bother me, I don't understand it! The Subject line is "What's up with this" That's a question not an indictment. I Also put a caveat (not all). Much Like LoriSue I have a medical condition that requires me to be off island on a wait list, I have no other choice but to take it day by day, hour by hour, and minute by minute. My personal perspective of wait time or island time could be a tolerance built up over my years of military service of "Hurry up and Wait". I hope the slower pace of the islands never changes, I like it. I also said many of the problems on the islands I can deal with. So I asked the question Neil, you answered with a question. I hope I answered your question.

" A Truly Happy Person is one who can enjoy the scenery while on a detour"

Posted : November 24, 2009 3:34 am
Posts: 2104
Noble Member

Wow so many of us seem to have chronic conditions. Part of the reason I relocated here was to feel better. My pace of life isn't much slower but it is definetly more enjoyable. I had to pretty much educate my Dr. on my condition but now he is up to speed and life is great. I truly believe that the sea, shunshine, the place and the culture is truly beneficial for my health and karma.

Posted : November 24, 2009 11:39 am
Posts: 3904
Famed Member

Glad to hear that, Bombi.

Posted : November 24, 2009 11:50 am
Posts: 477
Reputable Member

I was looking for this for a couple that just got here. I love this story!!!

Here's what I found that was previously posted. It is so true!! I think reading this a long time ago saved my sanity when about 6 months after moving here I slammed into phase two and was so frustrated with everything. Fortunately, I remembered this and it helped me step back from everything that I was frustrated about and laugh at my frustrations and remind myself why I live here.

palmetto [ PM ]
Re: Q's on Adjusting for those that moved to VI
June 21, 2007 07:28AM Registered: 2 years ago
Posts: 17
Hi Neil,

My wife and I have a bit of experience living overseas and adjusting to new places and cultures. We have always found that adjusting after a move comes in sort of three stages without any definable time limits because the stages are based on the individual. If you were to draw it the adjustment period would look like a rising peak, followed by a valley, and then leveling off to a coastal plain.

More specifically, the first stage is the honeymoon period, which is characterized by an irrational love of everything (both good and bad) that your new location has to offer. For example, the beaches are unreal, the folks here sure do drive crazy but that’s ok I’ll wear my seatbelt, or my favorite – you mean you don’t have any raisin bran in stock without bugs, boy that’s great I love this place this must be one of those cultural differences I heard about before I moved.

The second stage, which can creep up unnoticed, is a complete one-eighty change from stage one and is quite easy to distinguish because you will now display a very strong disdain and hate for everything your new location has to offer. For example, what do you mean you can’t fix my electric for two weeks!!!? Or, if I have to wait five hours to pay my phone bill again today I just might go insane and start banging my head against the wall to kill the time. And the favorite, you don’t have any raisin bran in stock without bugs? I truly hate this place why on earth did I move here.

The third stage is the leveling off period where you find a balance between stages one and two. You will know you’re in the third and final stage when, driving to the store to get the now ubiquitous raisin bran a cement truck coming in the other direction tries to kill you by running you off the road and you begin to shout expletives and lose your temper but then you remember…after you stop at the store you’re going to the beach while friends that you talked to just that morning were digging out from another foot of snow and suddenly you realize that life’s not that bad after all.

Of course, the times vary greatly above depending on the individual…Keep a positive attitude and a sense of humor and you will be fine if you move.

Providing organic relief from the common cubicle.

Posted : June 25, 2011 3:40 am
Posts: 124
Estimable Member

Wise comment Palmetto!

Thank you for your insight - appreciated!

Posted : June 25, 2011 11:06 am
Posts: 95
Trusted Member

Hello, everyone.

My name is Kass, and my husband and I are contemplating the move to USVI. I've been reading a lot of the messages on this board as well as the stories on VImovingcenter.com to try and get the feel of other people's experiences. I too noticed that there seem to be a lot of people complaining because USVI wasn't what they wanted it to be when they moved.

I read this thread with interest. When I was 19, I lived in Japan for the school year, and I found that many of my fellow American students spent most of their time complaining about Japan. What they were really complaining about was that it wasn't like home.

I think it's very likely that people experience a similar thing in USVI. They think "It's the US! How different could it possibly be?" And that's their big mistake.

The "Three Stages of Adjusting" post is wonderful. Thank you to whomever originally wrote it and also to goalusvi for posting it again.

Something fdr said in a post from November 2009 intrigues me: "moving to paradise doesn't change who you are the way you hoped it would"

It makes me ask myself why we want to move to USVI. On the surface, we complain about the winters here in the Northeast. The past two winters have been severe. But on the other hand, I love the autumn here. We also talk about getting away from the rat race. But since we'll be taking our business with us (we run a website), will the rat race lessen for us in USVI? Or will power outages and spotting internet service just make us more stressed out? Are we running towards something imaginary or are we running away from something that is really inside of us?

Who knows? I don't know if you even can know the answers to this. Who successfully make the move? Is it the people who plan perfectly? Or is it the people who "burn their boats" and decide never to leave no matter what?

I don't know the answer. But thanks for making me think.

Posted : June 27, 2011 3:28 pm
Posts: 495
Reputable Member

It's worth noting that often newcomers or curious people come to this forum to ask questions or seek advice about a problematic issue. A discussion may ensue, an argument might arise, hasty words may fly around, but the problem always evaporates while the discussion lasts forever in the archives.

Once most newcomers get over the initial challenges they tend to visit this board less and less frequently. In most cases you can mark their absence as a successful relocation.

Posted : June 27, 2011 4:58 pm
Posts: 95
Trusted Member

That is something I hadn't considered. Thank you, SunnyCaribe!

Posted : June 27, 2011 5:46 pm
Posts: 140
Estimable Member

Another thing to consider is that the new transplants often defend their move vigorously and accuse the 'long timers' of being too negative or having a personality that makes others treat them badly...then after a few months or a year, they cease to post and you find out that they too could not handle the reality of island life and quietly upped sticks and went back to the mainland!
They never post their experience or thoughts either!
There was a poster called Mel on here a while back...she was one of the islands biggest cheerleaders...I often wonder what happened to her...does anyone know?
Did she fall into "loved it and forgot about the board" or "hated it and slunk off"?

Posted : June 27, 2011 6:53 pm
Posts: 95
Trusted Member

You know, moving to USVI sounds a lot like marriage! You never know that his drinking O.J. right out of the carton is going to make you crazy until the honeymoon is over. 😀

Posted : June 27, 2011 9:19 pm
Posts: 727
Honorable Member

Kass, that is possibly the best way to describe it. Everyone try's to give you advice before you marry about how you have to work at it and nurture the relationship. And you hear them but you don't really understand them or believe you are different then everyone else. 🙂

Posted : June 27, 2011 9:52 pm
Posts: 421
Reputable Member

I remember Mel ... I wonder too where she went off to.

I've been here for over 4 years now (I can't believe it sometimes) and I LOVE it here.

Posted : June 27, 2011 9:54 pm
Posts: 95
Trusted Member

Kass, that is possibly the best way to describe it. Everyone try's to give you advice before you marry about how you have to work at it and nurture the relationship. And you hear them but you don't really understand them or believe you are different then everyone else. 🙂

Hee hee hee! I must be getting the hang of this. 😛

My husband thinks the best way to survive a move like this is to (A) plan well beforehand and (B) burn your boats so you have to make it work. He thinks you'll tend to take the "escape plan" if you give yourself an out. My auntie used to say the same thing about marriage -- if divorce is easy, why put up with him leaving the cap off the toothpaste.

Very interesting...

Posted : June 27, 2011 10:31 pm
Posts: 956
Prominent Member

I always tell people, come here expecting a move to a foreign country and you will be pleasantly surprised by how American it is. Come here expecting America and you will be disappointed by how foreign it is.

I find life here better in some ways, worse in others, and different in most.


Posted : June 28, 2011 4:01 am
Posts: 95
Trusted Member

Thanks Sean!

That's how felt about living in Japan. I expected it to be a completely different world. And then I was shocked by how much it was like home. I mean, of course it's going to be different. It's Japan! You really can't go there thinking that it's going to be like Main Street USA.

We keep telling ourselves USVI is a foreign country. I'm glad to know this is your advice too.

Posted : June 28, 2011 10:33 am
Posts: 421
Reputable Member

LOVE your post Sean !!! Thanks !!!

Posted : June 29, 2011 3:17 am
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