sorry to break the flow here, but about these centipedes... i've never been bitten by a centipede. how severe is it?
Sweeping out millipedes every morning before breakfast....
Daydreaming about the states while driving and pulling in the right lane....
Begin drinking liquor and smoking cause those are the cheapest things on the island....
I have to admit on my day off this week I went to get my hair cut and actually made the comment that I had on my good sandals. You know the leather ones you don't were to work. I guess I am home.
Jay
That centipede thing must be a St Croix problem, because I have never encountered one...
...when you walk up to doors and yell, "INSIDE!" instead of knocking.
...when you answer, "COME!" when someone yells "inside" to you...
...when you know some of the original Gypsy troupe...;)
You have friends that drive a dingy to work
You leave for work 20 minutes early if there are no ships in town, and an hour and 20 minutes early if there are four ships in
Your apartment was advertised as "quiet" in the Island Trader just because it's not downtown, but you wake up to what sounds like a cock fighting ring every morning.
It's cheaper to get hammered than full
You've learned not to make enemies cuz it's a "small island"
You've never gotten a ticket from a cop, just a stern talking to through the window
Every time you hear the words "I want to go home to St Thomas" you immediately chime in "St Thomas!"
You fall out of your seat laughing when in Pirates of the Caribbean, Johnny Depp yells, "Back to the ships!"
You've lived here a long time:..............
When you're not surprised when someone says they have 11 dogs. That seems normal!
When the pool is "cold" at 78 degrees.
When you get really excited when you see new stripes being painted on the road.
When you hire someone and you're surprised when they actually show up.
This actually happened to me. A friend was leaving a bar and was trashed. I noticed she was sitting in her jeep trying to get her headlights to work but had blown a fuse. The police officer that was standing there talking to her said she could not drive without headlights. When I offered her a ride the officer stated that since I had headlights she could follow me if I was willing to "escort" her home. Unbelievable! Permission from the police to drive drunk without headlights!!!!! You can't make this stuff up!
These have been great! Keep em coming.
When you time your water purchase the day before a day long rain. Just like I did yesterday! never fails!
I want to know the 3 centipede antidotes!
When....
asked for directions, you say...down the street and point in the general direction!
when you don't know the route numbers for the road!
you never have to wear stockings/pantyhose ever again!
you won't go swimming in the winter, even here!
when you don't OWN a pair of enclosed shoes! OOPS, I have sneakers for working out, sorry!
when you are awoken by a centipede or scorpion sting! (yes, I've had them both)!
when you are awoken by a hermit crab climbing on your slider's screen door or awoken by a land crab clamoring about your kitchen!
when you hear the pump running, you freak out and want to know WHY!!!!!! Toilet running? Oh, it's only you!
When you take navy showers and many people out there don't even know what that is!
(and yes, to take that bath when the cisterns are full.....ooooohh)!
when you have 12volt lighting for when the power goes out! Tho, I like candles too!
when your honey pees on the plants to water them! LOL!
when you reuse your rinse water to do the next load of wash!
when you save your dish water to water the plants!
when you put buckets out when its raining to catch as much water as you can and then put that in your cistern! (I've done it)!
Oh my gosh....I could go on and on!
When you remember
For the Birds,
Grumpys,
And The Three Virgins
Well really when you remember :
Trader Dan's
Carousel
Powderhorn
Lord Rumbottoms
Fat City
The Gate
Fearless Fred's
Sea Shanty
Grass Shack
Duffys - the Dad's place in town Creques Alley / Mama Cass
Big Bamboo
You bring a book to read while waiting for your turn at the doctor, the post office, etc.
Your story of how and why you moved here becomes 10 seconds or less (down from 2 minutes).
You're not alarmed that all your friends are drunk , and are about to drive themselves home.
You see a green and red traffic light together, and you don't have to think about what it means (it means you can go straight or left, but not right).
You know which lane to get in at each intersection, even though the painted lines and arrows are long faded.
You have tried 7 air conditioning contractors in 3 years (I have, anyway).
You have a Plan B for everything.
If you want to meet a particular person, you probably have a mutual friend who can introduce you.
You have 20 good friends, but no idea what their last names are. So you refer to them as "Steve the Bartender," or "Joe who used to date Chris."
When they 1st painted '911' on the police cars and the scuttlebutt was they were Porsches.
Exit Zero,
You made that up! Are you serious? What year was that? I'm laughing so hard, I'm almost crying!
Was this a serious thread? It was the scuttlebutt back in the early 80's but only as a joke about stealing the new 911 Porsches
You have 20 good friends, but no idea what their last names are. So you refer to them as "Steve the Bartender," or "Joe who used to date Chris."
----------------------------
LOL!!!! That is SO true!!!! And the scary part is, other people know exactly who "Steve the Bartender" or "Joe who used to date Chris" is!!!
When you remember: (and miss)
Shore Line Cafe, Fiddle Leaf, The Fishery and (the old) Bryans Bar!!
You go "Pssssst" to get someones attention and no longer think it RUDE! lol!
When I first moved here, I HATED it when someone did that to me! I used to work on the old JIM DANDY ICE CREAM truck in Emancipation Gardens (remember that)? My back was to the window and a man came to the window and Pssssted at me. I told him very nicely that I found that to be rude and he was so kind to explain to me that it isn't meant to be rude, but that is simply how it is done down here to get ones attention! I thought...yada, yada, yada........
Later that day I went grocery shopping and a sweet little ole' West Indian lady had dropped her newspaper up a head and she didn't know she had done that. SOOOOO, I tried to get her attention! "Miss!, excuse me!, Yoohoo!, Hello!, .......whatever I could think of! NO AVAILE!! She was getting further and further away! I finally went "PSSSSST"!!!!!!! SHE TURNED RIGHT AROUND!!!!! LOL!!!! OK, I give up! That is a custom here and if I am going to live here, well then, that is the way it is!!!!!!! 🙂
When you remember: Barnacle Bills, Pinnocio's, Yesterdays - before that it was Calabash, Partners on back street, Gregorys East, to name just a few!
Bumping up this thread, because I just rediscovered it and it is so very funny! 🙂 I would add:
-- when you hear someone say "tree" and you think they mean the number, not a plant!
First time I've read these. Great!
When you go to the registry of motor vehicles to get your car re registered and your are shocked that a) they actually inspect it and b) it only took an hour or two at the registry
When you go to the States and go to a real movie theater and the first thing you think of when you see the movie is that those people are driving on the wrong side of the road
When new to the island state siders tell you how they are going to fix things down here and enlighten us in the Virigin Islands you don't even bother to say anything you just chuckle to yourself and wonder how long they'll last down here
When you think its normal for all chinese food to come with fries
When you know what a Santo bar is
When you count the number of EDC companies you've worked for and it totals more than the number of years you've lived here
When you see an old car with the "Richard for Senate" bumber stickers and you think it wasn't a bad idea
When you think its normal that your friends who like the herb tell you there is a drive through gas station where they purchase the herb
When you call the Melvin Evans highway the Go fast highway because it really is
When you understand what "its finish" means when told to you by a store clerk and you don't even consider asking when they might be getting more because you know better than to bother asking
When you drink straight scotch because your are a) too lazy to mix a cocktail and b) the mixers cost more than the liquor
When you don't ever consider mailing in your taxes because you know they'll lose it and you wont have proof you filed it
When it seems normal that "booty call 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, and 6" are the only films playing at sunny isle
When all you want your xmas, your birthday or any other holiday is a generator for your house
When you mark time as pre and post Hugo
When you bargain with the car wash guys at the government parking lot
This thread has given me the biggest belly laugh I have had in days, thanks to all of you. I have daughters that live on island for the past seven years and with our yearly visits with them have encountered may of these things. The first time down I was shocked at some, the second year annoyed but by the third year felt much more at home and knew what to expect and now seven years later when my husband and I visit it is like slipping into a comfy pair of slippers you can't bare to throw away..you know you should but they just feel so good.
When "cheese and bread" becomes part of your vocabulary
When you remember the "rum and coke" administration
When you know what a carnival "floop" is
When you stop wondering how checkout clerks could possible operate a register with press on nails that long
When you read the Avis purely to laugh at the grammatical errors
When you are thankful you have not one but two Kmarts on island (and remember when the sunny isle one was woolworths)
When you think its normal to be offered a go cup at a restaurant or bar
Digging out your winter wardrobe mean getting out the dark-coloered shorts and T-shirts
You no longer miss cute furry critters like bunnies, squirrels, and chipmunks
And, on a more somber note...
Gun shots in your neighborhood no longer result in a single call to the police because everyone knows from past experience, no one will come...
When you know not to grocery shop on the first or second of the month because the stores will be packed and you know why they will be packed
When you know what the traffic violation DWW means
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